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A female employee. Embezzlement. Blackmail.


I was weeping for different reasons as I watched him out the windows, cutting trimming, blowing and then doing weird things to hedges that were probably scared for their lives it had been so long since they had been trimmed.


"In here."

I looked at my son. He was not the visible mess he had been when I first saw him earlier. He had taken a shower and was at least in clean clothes. At this moment though Roy looked so much like his father, I had to bite down on my anger hard. Oh, I was mad as hell at my son too, but I didn't want my anger at his father coloring what I wanted to say to him.

"Dad called. He, ah ... he wants me to like come stay with him and Shelby for ... well, for a while." He couldn't look at me all of a sudden. "I told him I would talk to you about it."

And with that I felt like the three-legged stool of my life lost its second leg and I was now sitting on a pogo stick. I could hear in his voice that he wanted to do it. I knew the basis of that, his dad wouldn't watching him like I do ... but then Roy had become a drug-head with me watching him so I guess I was sucking hind tit at that too. I looked at my son.

Just looked at him.

"And you want to do it?" I poured the bubbling hot fudge into the pan and shook the pan to take out the air bubbles as I poured. "You will have to change schools here at the beginning of your senior year. And just so you know, your dad is most likely doing this to keep from paying me what he owes. He's not doing it because he wants you there with him. Not saying it to be mean it's simply a fact about your father." I moved over to him and lifted his chin till he was looking me in the eyes. "If he wanted you in his life he would have stayed. Or at least fought me for custody."

"He says you hate him."

I thought about it for a moment then gave a small nod. "Yeah, that's a pretty close assessment of it. He was my first love, he stole my heart." I looked at him seeing his father at the same age. "Then, when I was suddenly not a size two anymore, he broke my heart. So, yeah, he is tops on my shit list, well he's tied now with that fucker who had better not ever show his ass around here again, Zane."

"I spoke to Zane about that," There was suddenly a defensive tone in my son's voice that set a fire in my throat. He was actually defending his friend, too me! "He said you got it all wrong, that he was just trying to help you deal with the trip. And then Gabriel attacked him."

Moving my hand to the collar of my shirt, I pulled it down till the hand print, now a nasty green-purple-black, on my breast showed. "Well, his helping left this. Don't. Just don't. I'm still not sure I'm not going to press charges for at least sexual assault against him. I need too. Hell, the only reason I'm not is that you're involved and I don't need a scandal. My job sucks, but I can lose it over that sort of thing. No matter that I'm the victim or not."

"Mom, I ..."

"Don't say you're sorry. Don't. You made a choice. You. The drug came into this house and I took it as consequences of your choices." Outside the sound of a leaf blower, or some other gas powered yard tool, ended. "The only reason I didn't get raped last night is Gabriel. Every choice you make affects not only yourself but those around you. Now, I have to finish getting ready for a party, which thanks to your father, and his petty level crap, no one may be attending. I want you to think about that, what I just said, and about going to live with your father. Then make your choice. We'll talk about it tomorrow."

I turned my back--probably robbing Roy of a chance to apologize again--as the backdoor opened and my angel, all sweaty and smell of exhaust fumes and grass, stood there. He looked uncomfortable for a moment at the two of us, and then I heard Roy leave the room behind me.

Gabriel shot me a questioning look.

"We talked.

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